99 Problems
by LostInTheThicket
Summary: Tony Stark visits the Champions having some downtime, playing an interesting game that resonates with his nostalgia. Ever the opportunistic genius, his confidence rises to the surface as his interest is piqued. Will the blocks rise with it? Spoilers: it won't. Because he's Tony Stark.


_**DISCLAIMER: Everyone, except Mickey, is owned by Marvel and Disney. Tetris 99's owned by Nintendo.**_

* * *

_**A nice, humorous one-shot that features Tetris 99, my current addiction. And so, why not make some of my favourite characters super-salty, huh?**_

_**It'll be fun. Enjoy. :)**_

* * *

"Fuckin' fuck you, dude!"

Swearing and raucous laughter emanated from within one corner of the New Avengers Facility. **Tony Stark** walked in the room where the Champions were all gathered around a television screen. He watched as Jennifer 'Jenny' Takeda – aka Hazmat – gripped the controller, cussing up a storm.

"Last one," Jenny muttered, trying her best not to get upset…and failing.

Michaël 'Mickey' Villanueva – aka Soundclash – cackled uproariously. "'Last one', eh?"

"Last one! Shut the hell up!"

Mickey's laughs echoed through the room as Tony made his presence known. "Greetings, dorks. Oh, playing Tetris instead of saving the world, huh?"

They all turned to Tony, greeting him with various reactions.

Jeanne Foucault – aka Finesse – shook her head. "They haven't stopped playing Tetris 99 in hours. It's kind of monotonous."

Tony turned to Jeanne in disbelief. "I'm sorry. What's it called again?"

"The game is called 'Tetris 99'. It's marketed as a 'battle royale', but it's rather banal if you ask me."

Hearing the conversation, Mickey chuckled, shaking his head.

"Eh, Jeanne's just mad salty because she got targeted by everybody on her very first game."

"I don't get 'mad salty,' Mickey." Jeanne shook her head, displaying a brief – _very brief – _flash of anger on her face as she crossed her legs. "Unlike you, I finished in the top five. Besides, I would've won, too. Those idiots were just intimidated that—"

The rest of the Champions exclaimed and laughed, marvelling at how salty Jeanne sounded.

Gwen Stacy smirked. "See, guys? Excuses."

The leader of the Champions, Seol Hee – aka Luna Snow – spoke up as she tried to calm Jenny down, her voice soft and gentle. "I remember you said that 'Champions don't make excuses'."

Jeanne smirked. "You're quite right, Seol. We don't. However, it isn't hard to make excuses when…" She gestured to the screen. "Well…"

As Jenny turned to it, she paid little attention to the game…and it was about to cost her dearly.

"Oh, no, no! Shit! Not again! Damn it!"

Twenty other competitors targeted her and as the blocks suddenly rose to the top, Jenny's world came tumbling down. Defeated, Jenny frowned. Her game was over…with her in 75th place.

"Come on, guys!" Jenny groaned. "Stop distracting me! It's annoying!"

Tony observed the scene in greater detail: he watched Ava Ayala sulking in the corner, staring at the T.V. with malice; Gwen and Miles Morales cheering Jenny on, trying to calm her down; Mickey being the typical shit-stirrer and poking fun at the whole thing despite being salty from Jeanne's words.

It was a stunning sight. _This is strange, _Tony pondered.

He suddenly turned to see Melissa Gold – aka Songbird – sipping a cup of coffee, staring at the entire scene.

"Can you believe this?" Tony said to Melissa in disbelief. "It's like a Greek tragedy in here."

Melissa glanced at Tony before staring at the raucous scene. "Hm."

"It's crazy. I mean, c'mon. It's Tetris. I've cleaned out entire arcades filled with people in this game. With just two quarters, actually."

Melissa tried her best not to roll her eyes. "Hm."

"And to think these guys can't win a single game…" He gestured dismissively at the screen.

"It's not that easy," Melissa spoke up, "You're playing with 98 people at the same time."

Tony stopped, turning to Melissa with a curious grin etched across his face. "Really?"

"Yup."

Jeanne slowly turned to face them. "Melissa had a hand in trying the game out. Unfortunately, she was out in 95th place."

Melissa sported a less-than-pleased look on her face, watching the confident polymath shrug her shoulders. Turning to see Mickey giggling to himself, she smirked.

"Don't laugh, Hoss. I'm not the only one. You were out in 96th." Melissa sipped on her coffee with a wink.

Everyone turned to look at Mickey and his shit-eating grin collapsing on itself. It turned into a frown as his face was flushed crimson.

"They targeted me too," he muttered, curling into a ball. "Shut up, Goldie."

Tony placed his hands on his sides. "Who got the farthest?"

The Champions all pointed to Miles as he put up three fingers.

"4th place, just in front of Jeanne. I was lucky, but I was kinda in the zone!" He said, turning to Gwen as they exchanged a smile.

Now completely interested, Tony stepped forward. "Hey, when you're finished, how about letting me show you all how it's done?"

Jenny stopped playing with a huff, turning to Tony as she gave him the controller. "Let's see what you got then, Stark! Go!" She crossed her arms as Mickey tried to pat her shoulder. "Don't you touch me."

As Tony made room on the couch, Melissa walked forward, whispering to Jeanne. "Heh, Stark won't last long…"

* * *

Minutes later, the game was over. Everyone was silent, stunned to see what happened.

"How the hell did he do that?" Mickey exclaimed.

Jenny sat, stewing in silence and anger over what had transpired.

Seol shook her head, her dazzling icicle earrings making a clinking sound in the room. "토니 스타크는 정말 대단해요... (Tony Stark is amaaaaazing…)"

Tony sat back, sighing in relief and sheer pride over what he accomplished. "Well, first place for the fifth time in a row. See? It's just Tetris."

He flipped the controller over to Seol as she caught it, marvelling at Tony's sick Tetris skills. "Can you teach—"

"Sorry, no can do. I'm busy today." Tony sat up as he looked to all of the Champions. "But, hey, I'll tell you what. If you can beat me in _Asteroids_, I'll give all of you some tips. Now, if you'll all _excuse _me…"

With a bow, he made his way out of the room…but not before firing a parting shot at Melissa. "I gotta tell Peter I beat 98 people in Tetris. Five times in a row, 'Goldie'."

As a smiling Tony made his way out of the room, the Champions all turned to each other before they stared at the screen. Jenny was the only one to speak up…

"Sometimes, I wanna fill Tony's suits with ants."

The Champions – even Miles and Jeanne – nodded in agreement.

Melissa sipped on her cup. "Hm."


End file.
